in prayer

As i walked through the male ward of internal medicine, i saw a patient sitting at the side of his bed, head bowed in silent prayer, beside him was a priest. It was one of the most solemn scenes i have witnessed.

Despite the clash and noise of a busy monday afternoon, during visitation hours, i cannot help but be swayed to the direction of the praying teenager. On first look, he does not seem sick. But upon seeing his chart, he is a 19-year old diagnosed with infective endocarditis- his heart has grown bacteria inside and these organisms are being spread all over his body with every heartbeat. Oh yes! He may seem like a regular healthy person, but from my experience, he is like a ticking time bomb, and anytime, he can explode.

At the ER, i watched as a group of doctors are aggressively compressing the chest of an adult male. His heart has stopped beating from a massive myocardial infarction or heart attack, and as the heart attack continued to impede the heart, it stopped functioning. Automatically, the healthcare workers rushed to the patient, administering advanced cardiac life support- doing chest compressions and giving all the medications to make his heart beat again. After 15 minutes of resuscitation, the patient's heart started to beat.

The doctors then approach the crying wife and explained everything that happened- that the compressions and the drugs given made the heart beat again, and soon it will wear off. The chances of the patient's heart to stop beating is high and the chances of reviving him becomes lower each time. At that point, the doctors can only offer suppportive care and a prayer. With the consent of the wife, the patient was referred to the chaplain for anointment, after which she signed an advanced directive of not resuscitating the patient should his heart stop.

I heard mass this palm sunday and the church was packed with people outside holding their palms, waiting for the end of the mass for them to be blessed. We squeezed our way inside as there was more space there. It wasn't surprising that there were that many people compared to other sundays of the year. It also happens during easter, ash wednesday, new year and christmas- the occassions when people remember to go to mass.

I passed by the chapel of our hospital on my way home and saw a few people inside. Some were kneeling on the pew, eyes closed, deep in prayer. Some were seemingly begging, brushing away tears as they talk to God. And some were lying down on the chairs and sleeping.

I am a mere observer. But it hit on me. When is the right time to pray?

April 3, 2012

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I have been driven many times to my knees by the overwhelming conviction that I had nowhere else to go. ~Abraham Lincoln