Wednesday, October 17, 2012

pursuing happiness

It is only now, at 32, when i found myself thinking if i have really been happy.

Four years of high school, 4 years of college, 5 years of med school, 3 years of residency, i found myself hanging on to the security of continuing education with the fear of change.

Six years of earning on my own, i enjoyed the perks of having my own money to spend for some luxury and for that sense of fun and freedom

Eleven years out of college, i started my independence, in the process, looking for that ultimate happiness- career, education, relationships. Lots of ups. But lots of failures as well.

Now, in my third year of residency, my third vacation during residency, i found myself thinking, have i really pursued my happiness?

Met with friends and relatives who took us to good places to eat- restaurants, large buffets, that i just had to stuff myself with all i can see and finish everything off (so glad i don't gain much weight). Ahh, why haven't i tried this before?

I found myself in a vegas hotel room, waking under a warm blanket late in the morning, with the view of the strip. Ahh why haven't i done this before?

Went out to the outlet shops and goodness! I never thought such can be that cheap. Ahh why haven't i bought much stuff before?

In a party in LA, there was this cute puppy who is just so gorgeous! Mumu is your ultinate toydog, ultimate companion. Ahh, why haven't i had one of these

In the same party, my cousin brought her 8-month old baby girl, carried her in my arms. tried to pacify her crying (well she doesn't know me), and eventually she did. made her laugh, and i laughed with her. Ahh, why do i not have one of these?

At 32, i thought i would have done a lot but i realized, i have a lot more years to spend looking for happiness.

Maybe i'm living my life wrong.

Life is short. I choose happiness. Let go of sadness or anything that will just lead to that.

With that in mind (and not stepping on anyone's toes), i can never go wrong.

Be happy.